How I fell pregnant naturally after 5 years of struggling to conceive

My fertility journey started very normal. I met a guy, fell in love, got married, and decided to start a family.

That is where normal ends. Here’s where it went a little pear shaped………

I tried my darndest to fall pregnant naturally for 2 years. I tried everything, I searched high and low for that magic pill. I listened to all my friends and family who knew a friend of a friend who had tried a certain herbal tea, or a cousin who fell pregnant after doing a certain diet.

So, we drank the tea, did the diet, we did ALL the things that google says you should do. And if you’re on this journey, you know there’s a LOT of stuff out there.

So much so, it’s overwhelming and then you start over thinking. Oh, it’s my fault it didn’t happen this month because I didn’t drink the tea in the morning – I waited until night time. I drank a glass of wine this month, so it’s my fault – I knew I shouldn’t have done that!! Perhaps my bath water was too hot?

Our search for the cure becomes a source of punishment and guilt…..and stress.

Anyway, you get my point – there is a lot of advice out there. We get caught up in the vicious cycle of working out the exact combination. It becomes an obsession. Now if that technique works for you, sister, keep doing it. But if it’s a source of frustration or anxiety, put down the book, close down your google search engine and just breathe.

Anyway, after 2 years we were told the only option for us to have our own baby was via a surrogate. We were lucky enough that my beautiful sister in law volunteered to have a baby for us. For the next 2 years we still struggled. 9 IVF cycles and one miscarriage later, we finally had a beautiful baby boy.

Two weeks after he was placed in my arms, we fell pregnant naturally.

We fell pregnant naturally after our fertility specialist told us there was a 0.01% chance of us ever falling pregnant naturally. Our case even went in front of a panel of doctors and they all declared the only option for us was surrogacy. For 5 years we never saw a positive pregnancy test.

So, it’s no surprise that this is the question that people ask me time and time again - what did you do to fall pregnant naturally?

My previous answer was always, NOTHING!!

But today I am a fertility coach, supporting women in their quest to get pregnant faster. I explore the mind-body connection and how your mind can get you pregnant, how to fall pregnant faster, and ways to improve fertility naturally.

And all of a sudden it falls into place. What I have been teaching others is EXACTLY what happened to me. But it happened unconsciously.

So, what did I do to fall pregnant naturally not once, but twice, after 5 years of struggling to conceive?

1. I cut back on stress.

I’m your typical Type A personality, overachiever. I love working, I love the thrill of a deadline and being productive 24/7. But the whole time I was trying to conceive I worked in stressful roles – Associate Director in Corporate Finance, Chief Financial Officer. I worked around the clock and didn’t have an off button. I strived for promotions and I felt I needed to prove myself. But I was exhausted. I fell pregnant after being on maternity leave for 3 weeks. No deadlines now or for the next 6 months of being on maternity leave allowed me the space to breathe and release the tension I had been holding onto for so long.

2. My mindset was focused on Abundance, not Lack.

For 5 years I had focused on all the things I didn’t have i.e. a baby. Every time I looked at pregnant women, I felt the emptiness inside me grow. I yearned for what they had, and I was completely consumed and focused on the fact that I didn’t have a baby. As soon as our little boy was placed in my arms, that focus changed. I was consumed by my baby. And what you focus on grows.

3. I was consumed by LOVE.

It was this intense feeling of complete joy. For 5 years I had been so angry and frustrated…….and angry. But once I switched from anger to love, it was like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders. I was in a bubble of love and sweetness.

4. We started having sex for fun.

Yep, I know that sounds weird. But being consumed by love extended to the bedroom too. Infertility can ruin your sex life. It sucks all the romance out of it. Sex becomes a chore, or for us, it became a source of failure. There is a scene in Sex and the City where Miranda in the heat of the moment yells to Steve “Just get it over with”. This was us for 5 years. But after we jumped off that rollercoaster, our mojo came back. The pressure was off and we weren’t just having sex for reproduction, we were having fun.

5. I removed the self-limiting beliefs on motherhood.

I didn’t know it at the time, but I had some unconscious beliefs that were floating around in my head. “Being a mum is hard work”, “You have to sacrifice everything to be a good mum”, “This probably isn’t happening because you won’t be a good mum”. And then my baby boy came along, and I was doing it. I was a good mum, and to be honest, it wasn’t that hard – the first few weeks of motherhood were a breeze. So those self-limiting beliefs fell away.

Now before you say, well, that’s great for you Jen, but you had a baby in your arms to allow you to make all of these changes. Yes, I did. But there are things you can do to right now to get the same result.

And THIS is what I practice in my private coaching program.

It isn’t rubbish I’ve found in a text book. Through certain practices, I have replicated the things that happened in my life to allow me to fall pregnant naturally. If I hadn’t experienced it first hand I would have been skeptical too. But these are the facts.

We focus on ways to decrease stress, change your thought patterns, your emotions and create a life that you love right now. These are techniques that help you not only fall pregnant quicker (research has shown that mind-body programs can improve fertility by more than 50%), but they are skills that you will use in motherhood and beyond.

If you’d like to know more, go ahead and book in your free 30-minute connection call to see if we’re a good fit.

You can hear a little more on this topic on my YouTube channel below.

p.s. If you struggle with pregnancy announcements and find yourself cringing every time you open your social media account, don’t miss out on your FREE Pregnancy Announcement Survival guide. Fear no more, because this is tried and tested!!

Jennifer Robertson